Making Friends in Adulthood

Making friends as children didn’t require much thought. Simple innocence and little to no fear approaching another kid- friendships were quick to blossom. However, making friends as adults proves to be much harder. How and where to meet new people, what to say and how to connect- all these and more can be hurdles in creating new friendships in adulthood. However, with the right mindset and approach, building meaningful connections in adulthood is not only possible but also enriching.

I’ve recently met a few women at a local church event and this is my most recent experience in creating friendships as adults. These new friendships have added so much value to my life from community to new adventures. Although initiating new friendships can be daunting, the result is invaluable.

In this blog post, we’ll talk about where to meet new friends, how to spark these connections, how to prompt easy conversations and tips to keep the friendship alive.

Find friendships in spaces where you’ll find like minded people. Whether that be at work or social places, go where like-minded people are. If you enjoy a certain hobby, find where in your community that activity is hosted. Try the local basketball drop-in if you like to play basketball. Connect with others in your church or try serving to meet people of your faith. Make an effort to connect with colleagues. These environments provide opportunities to connect with others who share your hobbies or passions.

Now that we know where to go to foster new connections with like minded people, how do we connect with them? Take the initative to introduce yourself and start the conversation. I was once at a large Christian worship gathering and often went alone. This once week in particular, I was sitting alone a few seats down from another girl. She boldly came up to me, introduced herself and invited me to a Bible study to her house the following week. She has quickly become a dear friend who has had such an impact on my life and faith. Be bold. You never know who you’ll meet and what that simple first introduction could lead to.

But what do you talk about with someone you just met. I heard on a podcast once that a simple conversation starter can be something based on the environment you’re in. If you’re at a coffee shop, you can start by talking about the decor, or how busy it is, or the beverage you’re drinking, maybe asking them in they have any recommendations on the menu. If you’re at church, they often allocate time in the sermon to meet and greet one another. This is often where my introverted self wants to slip away to refill on coffee or go to the washroom, but I’ve pushed myself to approach people, ask them if they’re new to the church community and be that welcoming face. Wherever you find yourself meeting someone new, use the space you’re in to start the conversation and let it grow from there.

Once you make these new connections and these once strangers become friends, it’s important to devote time and effort to grow the friendship. Check out my latest blog post on “Building Habits to Build Friendships“.